Dear Abby >> I have been in a relationship with someone for 11 months. We’re both each other’s first relationship after being single for a few years following traumatic breakups. During our entire relationship, he has not cut his hair, left his house or socialized with anyone besides me, except via text.

He doesn’t visit me, but he always leaves his door open for me. We have discussed going out, but he always finds a reason to stay inside. After a while, I realized they were just excuses. He claims to be fine, but his mother and I are worried. She told me he became this way after his breakup and COVID.

My boyfriend always seems happy around me and states that he wants to marry and have children. He also says “I love you” and expresses his desire to be with me. His social media shows a completely different man, but it was all prior to his breakup. What should I do?

— Discouraged in Michigan

Dear Discouraged >> Because this man was a different person before his breakup and the COVID pandemic, and his mother is also worried about him, speak up. People who lose interest in things they used to do and no longer groom themselves may be suffering from depression, which his doctor could help him with.

Make it clear to your reclusive boyfriend that you have been patient for almost a year now, and if he wants to continue having a relationship with you, he must consult a licensed mental health professional about his fear of leaving his house. Without professional help, he won’t get better, and this could become your life as well.

Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.