“It’s been like this since the Garden of Eden,” Cy the Cynic grumbled to me in the club lounge. “God told Adam that a good woman costs an arm and a leg, and Adam wanted to know what he could get for a rib.”

“So you and Wendy are still having trouble defending,” I sighed.

Cy is of the opinion that women can barely follow suit; Wendy thinks that all men are a few beers short of a six-pack, and Cy is their king. The two are relentless adversaries even when they are partners in a penny game.

“I was West,” the Cynic said, showing me today’s deal, “and I admit that I overbid egregiously. We might actually make four spades, but South went to five diamonds.

“I led the king of spades,” Cy went on, “and declarer took the ace and led a club: my nine won. South ruffed my queen of spades, took the K-A of trumps and led another club. When Wendy took the ace, she led a low heart. South let it ride to dummy’s queen and claimed 11 tricks. Wendy said my bidding was Neanderthal, and I should give up bridge and take up basket-weaving.”

“You could have ribbed her, so to speak, about her defense,” I said mildly.

When Wendy took the ace of clubs, she could place South with the ace of hearts for his bidding. It’s not obvious, but Wendy beats five diamonds if she leads a third spade, conceding a ruff-sluff. Declarer can ruff in his hand and pitch a heart from dummy, but after he takes the ace of hearts and ruffs two hearts with dummy’s last two trumps, he will still have a losing heart.

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