Dear Abby >> I have been married for quite a long time, and I am seriously contemplating walking away from it. We no longer have anything in common. I’m active and hike, bike, play golf and lift weights. My wife is 100% sedentary and wants no part of any of these activities that could keep us both healthy. It has taken a toll on her to the point that she has become obese and has mobility issues. Even a small amount of exertion exhausts her, which leaves me doing almost everything. I did not sign up to be someone’s caretaker because she didn’t take care of herself.

For a long time, I have become friendly with a woman who is active and healthy like me. We have much more in common than just being active. She tells me she loves my intelligence and what a great career I had. I never received any support from my wife. I am tired of being a slave. I want a partner. Your thoughts?

— Fit in New York

Dear Fit >> I think your marriage started failing before you met this active, health-conscious woman. As it stands, you are emotionally divorced before being legally divorced. Talk to an attorney, then tell your wife that you haven’t felt emotionally supported by her for a long time and you want a divorce so you can be with someone whose interests and lifestyle more closely align with yours. From what you have written, I doubt your marriage could be saved by counseling because, emotionally, you have already moved on.

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