Dear Abby >> I am a 50-plus-year-old, married, well-educated woman. I am also a kleptomaniac and I’m not proud of it. It started a few years back when I accidentally left an item in my shopping cart. Since then, I have found it easy to take things — shoes, makeup, jewelry, clothing.

I am out of control. I want to stop this madness within myself, but I can’t tell anyone. Please help me.

— Taking What’s Not Mine in Tennessee

Dear Taking >> Stopping this “madness within yourself” on your own obviously isn’t working. Embarrassing as it may be, the time has come to admit to someone who is qualified to help you that you need it. Your doctor or medical insurance company may be able to refer you to a licensed psychotherapist while keeping the matter confidential.

Dear Abby >> I went to dinner with a friend who had told me a couple of years ago that he was an alcoholic and had gone into rehab. Since that time, I have had doubts about his sobriety due to his serious family problems.

When we had dinner recently, I ordered a glass of wine, and he ordered his usual Diet Coke. At the end of dinner, I went to the restroom and on my way back I saw him take a couple of sips of my leftover wine. When I returned to the table, I said nothing. I’m not sure if that was the right thing to do. If not, what should I have said to witnessing an alcoholic have a drink?

— Surprised in New York

Dear Surprised >> Your friend may be an alcoholic in recovery, but he still is one. It appears from your letter that his sobriety may be a bit wobbly. If the two of you are very close friends, you could have told him you saw what he did. If you are not, then you were right to remain silent because it wouldn’t have been helpful.

Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.