Colts at Vikings (-5½)

Indianapolis is turning to Joe Flacco at quarterback after benching Anthony Richardson. The Colts’ sophomore raised eyebrows last week by “tapping out” on his helmet because he was tired. Also tapping out this week: the American Electorate.

Pick: Vikings by 7

Commanders at Giants (+2½)

Daniel Jones doomed the Giants on Monday night in Pittsburgh with a late-game interception. The deflected pass, snagged by the Steelers’ Beanie Bishop, floated in the air so softly it would have been caught by anybody on the planet with the exception of Aaron Judge.

Pick: Commanders by 7

Patriots at Titans (-2½)

Former Patriots star Rob Gronkowski revealed that he was college buddies with one of the Yankees fans who wrestled with Mookie Betts during Game 4 of the World Series. Imagine our surprise to learn Gronk actually knows dudes more Gronkier than he is.

Pick: Titans by 3

Bears at Cardinals (-1½)

The Bears lost last Sunday on a Hail Mary pass when Tyrique Stevenson taunted fans during the final play, then batted the ball to Washington’s Noah Brown. It was the most embarrassing display Chicago fans had seen since the end of the White Sox season.

Pick: Bears by 3

Lions at Packers (+4½)

Former Green Bay QB Aaron Rodgers is touting his new “fountain of youth” elixir, which is basically cayenne pepper-infused water. He says the concoction makes him feel better, and as for the taste, it doesn’t suck nearly as badly as the Jets.

Pick: Lions by 7

Saints at Panthers (+6½)

Bryce Young will get the start at quarterback again for 1-6 Carolina as Andy Dalton recovers after being involved in a car accident. But that doesn’t faze the commander in chief, as President Joe Biden declared that the Panthers are still garbage.

Pick: Saints by 7

Buccaneers at Chiefs (-8½)

Tampa Bay broke out the old Creamsicle jerseys last Sunday and promptly lost to NFC South rival Atlanta. While some Bucs fans love the bright throwbacks from the 20th century, many found the orange hue off-putting as it reminded them of Donald Trump’s face.

Pick: Chiefs by 3

Chargers at Browns (+1½)

Cleveland pass rush king Myles Garrett drew praise last Sunday for his “Terminator” Halloween costume. But he lost out in the Browns’ team competition to Jameis Winston, who stunningly masqueraded as a functional NFL quarterback.

Pick: Browns by 3

Dolphins at Bills (-6½)

South Florida honored Dwyane Wade with a statue outside the Miami Heat’s arena. While the edifice looks nothing like the Basketball Hall of Famer, it actually captures accurately the look on Wade’s face every time he sees Tua Tagovailoa getting tackled.

Pick: Bills by 14

Cowboys at Falcons (-2½)

Homer, Bart and the Simpsons will be on “Monday Night Football” for a specially themed broadcast of the Dec. 9 game between Dallas and Cincinnati. The Cowboys are a perfect choice as Jerry Jones’ team is even more cartoonish than the Simpsons, though a bit less animated.

Pick: Falcons by 3

Rams at Seahawks (even)

Geno Smith needs to be on his game Sunday in this pivotal NFC West showdown. The Seattle quarterback is doing extra neck-stretching exercises to prepare for the eventual moment when the Rams try to twist the facemask off of his head.

Pick: Rams by 3

Other games

Broncos at Ravens (-9½):

Pick: Ravens by 7

Raiders at Bengals (-7½):

Pick: Bengals by 7

Jaguars at Eagles (-7½):

Pick: Eagles by 11

Bye week

Steelers, 49ers

Record

Week 8

10-6 straight up

7-9 vs. spread

Season

80-43 straight up (.650)

70-53 vs. spread (.569)

All-time (2003-24)

3711-2063-14 straight up (.643)

2830-2814-144 vs. spread (.501)

You can hear Kevin Cusick on Wednesdays on Bob Sansevere’s “BS Show” podcast on iTunes. You can follow Kevin on Twitter — @theloopnow. He can be reached at kcusick@pioneerpress.com.