Dear Amy: I am a 24-year-old female, and I have never had sex. I am demi-sexual. This means I am unable to feel sexually attracted to someone without first having an emotional bond. (I do want sex, and could have a normal and healthy sex life with someone I knew well.) I have always wanted, more than anything, to be in a loving relationship.

It is virtually impossible for me to tell, upon meeting someone, if we will be friends or if I will fall in love far down the road.

This makes dating really hard. I think I need to be more upfront with telling guys about demisexuality and hope they will understand. I keep falling in love with “best friends” and then being rejected when I try to tell them that I want to be more than friends.

I am fit and attractive. I have wonderful friends and a promising career. I realize this isn’t the most important problem in the world. I volunteer and try to focus on helping others, but I have always had low self-esteem. I tend to throw away personal goals or sense of self in hopes of winning someone over.

I work on self-improvement, but I don’t understand how to fix this or what makes me so different from other girls. I feel worthless, unattractive and unlovable.

I am going to therapy but have not had much luck with it. I just can’t take this pattern of loneliness and rejection. Do you have suggestions?

— Demi

Dear Demi: Demisexuality is more than being “old- fashioned” and courting for long periods before having sex; a demisexual person does not feel attraction until after a strong emotional bond has formed. This eliminates that butterfly-fluttery feeling many people experience quickly and which can accelerate a bond.

Demisexuality presents the challenge of not having sexual feelings until you’ve had many months of platonic friendship; some potential partners will have already moved into the friend zone, and many platonic friends would be confused if you expressed sexual interest after the friendship is understood to be nonsexual.

Because you are in therapy, you could ask your therapist about sex therapy. There may be ways you can feel sexual without — or before — finding a partner, and with someone you already have a strong emotional bond with. (I’m talking about you!)

Yes, if you meet someone in a “romantic” or dating context, then you should be honest about this. I see this as a third-date conversation. The right person will give you the time you need.

Dear Amy: For Christmas I opened custodial savings accounts for my four grandchildren, as well as whole life insurance policies. I also bought gifts for them (ages 1 through 7) to open and play with.

My oldest son was OK with these for his kids. My youngest son was upset that his name wasn’t on the account so he could have access to what was in it for his kids. The bank required their Social Security number to open the accounts. He accused me of being untrustworthy. He said if I didn’t add his (and his wife’s) name on the account, he would sue me! WHAAAT? I was creating these custodial accounts to be able to add money for their college educations!

I am devastated. Today I closed his kids’ accounts and moved my money to the other grandkids’ accounts. What do you think of this?

— In Shock

Dear In Shock: I hope you are receiving competent advice from a professional financial planner.

I think your son doesn’t want you to handle this in your own way. He has made a choice, followed up with a rude threat, and now he can bear the consequences. Continue to try to maintain relationships with these grandchildren.

Dear Amy: I’m responding to “Spouse in the Dark,” who wondered if she should go to memorial services that her (much older) husband attends.

I’ve been married for over 30 years, and I have accompanied my spouse to many services for people I’d never met. I never asked, nor waited for an invitation from him. Depending on his relationship with the departed, I’d decide if I needed to accompany him. I was there to support my husband.

— Supportive Spouse

Dear Supportive: Witnessing is powerful work.