Dear Eric >> I am a man in my 50s who has fulfilled a 10-year dream: I have written, produced and starred in a comedy web series. I worked diligently on the scripting, put up my own funding, hired professional lighting, sound and editing. Three weeks after it was cut, I uploaded it to a popular comedy website. To my dismay, I received some very negative, even cruel comments. Fortunately, I also received positive feedback.

But what shocked me is that three or four of my closest friends reacted with a shrug. They weren’t mean, but they couldn’t muster up much enthusiasm. Comments like, “It’s not my cup of tea”, or “I see what you were trying for” hurt me. Another friend advised me to post to other sites to expand viewing, but, frankly, I find myself becoming very chilly to those friends who didn’t love it.

Worse than feeling hurt by these friends is the realization that I’m a middle-aged baby for resenting their honest opinions. I believe in the series and want to take it to a larger site, but I’m concerned about my thin-skinned, childish feelings. Should I keep going with it, or accept it as a failure and move on? Meanwhile, I’m avoiding two of my friends simply for giving me their honest input.

— Comedy and Errors

Dear Comedy >> If you can stand a little more honest input, I’d encourage you to be kinder to yourself. It’s perfectly normal — and not at all babyish — to experience bruised feelings when people don’t like our work. Comments online can be especially harsh because people often forget — or willfully ignore — that there’s a human being on the other side of the computer. You make your art because it brings you joy, and you want to bring joy to others. It’s hard to then pivot when the art becomes a commodity that’s getting pulled apart and critiqued by strangers.

Or, as has happened to you, by friends. A hard truth about making art is that our friends and loved ones may not always be our target audience. I wish your friends had been able to commend you for the effort, even if they weren’t bowled over by your punchlines. But don’t let that stop you from feeling proud. You’ve done the hard part – you created something out of nothing, found the funding, put together the talent, and produced your dream. You’ve already reached some members of your ideal audience. Don’t forget that positive feedback.

Forgive your friends for not having the right words and when you upload the video to the bigger site, consider not reading the comments or asking someone else to summarize them. Even when the feedback is great, online comments can really leech the pleasure out of doing something. Plus, unless that feedback is going to help you make the next thing, you’ve got to ask yourself what it’s really for.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com