Dear Eric >> My husband loves going to the gym since he has retired. But he goes at 11 p.m. or midnight. He said there are just a couple of people there and he has access to all the machines, which is fine. The downside is that when he comes back home at 1:30-2 a.m. the garage door or the lights or the door just opening wakes me.

I have asked that he move the gym time earlier, but he doesn’t understand why this bothers me and why I wake up. I know he tries to be quiet, but I just hear this in my subconscious and just wake up.

By the time I fall back to sleep it’s 3 a.m. or 3:30 and I wake up at 4:20 to start my day and go to work. He is retired and can go anytime to the gym, and I still work. I go to bed at around 10:30 p.m. but the broken sleep is just killing me.

— Not Working Out

Dear Not Working Out >> I don’t know what kind of bodybuilder utopia you live in, but I’d wager that the gym is as empty at 2 a.m. as it is at 11 p.m., if not more so. So, see if your husband will go later, not earlier. This would have him getting home at the same time as you’re waking up.

You can also try earplugs and a sleep mask, to help preserve your slumber.

He’s got to compromise with you, though. He’s enjoying the privileges of retirement, and that’s great, but being free of a 9-to-5 isn’t the same as being free from courtesy and empathy in a relationship. Be firm about this — if he won’t work with you to find a solution, ask him why.

Dear Eric >> My son is now a senior in high school but since he was a young boy, I could see that he was not really into school. He gets Cs and Ds and doesn’t seem to be bothered by it. I know that he is very smart, though.

My husband and I have been saving for his college education and I have been telling him that he can go to whatever college he wants.

He is an exceptional artist and his art, drawings, paintings are really good. I told him it is an excellent hobby but getting a degree is what he needs. We are a lower middle-class family. I just want him to have something better than what my husband and I have.

The last time I mentioned college to my son, he said that he’s planning to go to a community college for two years and see what he wants after. Should I let him decide for himself? What should I do with the college fund we saved for him?

— Confused Mom

Dear Mom >> What a wonderful gift you’re giving your son. A college education is important, but it doesn’t guarantee a life of financial stability. Talk with him about what he would want if there were no expectations on him. Explore options for getting a degree in art. It could lead to professional success in graphic design, branding, interior design, art education, film or hundreds of other fields.

Also, talk with him about taking a gap year. Don’t give him the college fund for this year, though.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com.