


Q A woman was recently hired to fill a desperately needed position where I work. It’s not an easy job, the pay is terrible and it has a steep learning curve, hence why it was so hard to fill. From what I’ve seen, she is learning quickly and, most importantly, is kind to the children we work with. She is Black as are many of our kids, but she is one of the only Black people working here. Immediately, I noticed the people she works directly with being really hard on her and complaining about her behind her back.
One colleague complained to me about how much this new employee was getting paid and I can’t even figure out why she would know that information. Another has started asking me to report to her about how this new employee is doing her job when she’s with me. I always say: “Yes, she’s great! I’m so glad we found someone for the position!”
There have been loads of people in this position before her who were neither competent nor kind, so to me this all feels very clearly and obviously like racism. If she quits because of the toxic environment, our jobs get harder, the kids suffer, she’s out of a job. It’s a lose-lose-lose.
I want to talk to someone higher up, but I have no confidence it will be taken seriously. Our whole HR department quit and is being run by one overwhelmed retiree. The building administrators are all of the “not a racist bone in my body!” variety. I also don’t want to overstep because this woman and I barely know each other aside from friendly small talk and it’s been only about two weeks. Should I speak to her first? Should I call out my colleagues directly? I’m not a confrontational person normally, but this situation is really bothering me.
— Anonymous, Massachusetts
A Your colleagues are being racist. You should call them out directly, identifying the specific instances of their racism and microaggression. And yes, you should also bring up this racism to your administrators even if they would have voted for President Barack Obama for a third term. It is useful to have an institutional record even if that record will be ignored.
Sometimes, doing the right thing doesn’t effect change in the immediate. But it does demonstrate to your Black colleagues and other colleagues of color that there is a true ally in their midst. You may also want to check in with your new colleague to see how she is adjusting and whether she needs anything. If this is how your other colleagues are talking to you about her, I imagine your workplace must be a very lonely and isolating place for her.
Q I got a new job in September at a tech company that aggressively marketed themselves to candidates as “a remote-first, globally distributed company.” I was only interested in positions that were permanently, 100% remote and I would not have considered the role otherwise.
Things had been going great until they sent a companywide email last week announcing that all employees — even the hundreds that were hired to be fully remote — will now be required to go into the office three days a week. My offer letter clearly says my position would be remote and this is nonnegotiable for deeply personal reasons. This feels like a bait and switch.
If they won’t let me continue to work remotely, can I ask them to give me severance? If I were laid off, I would at least be eligible for unemployment benefits, but I won’t be if I’m forced to quit.
— Anonymous
A Permanence is relative, I’m afraid. You are definitely the victim of a bait and switch and this is unfortunately happening to a lot of people who were promised remote work but are now being forced to return to the office.
I’m afraid you aren’t in a good position to request severance because you don’t want to continue working for this company now that the terms of employment have changed. Legally, your employer has the right to change those terms. If you don’t have a contract (an offer letter is not a legally binding contract) explicitly stating the job will be remote only, your options are quite limited. It’s definitely time to start looking for new work.
Theoretically, you can ask for severance, but that sort of thing generally works when you have seniority and have been with an organization for a significant amount of time. If you want to try, you want to make a strong case for severance, outlining what you’ve brought to the organization over the past five months and why it’s in their best interest to agree to your request.
Roxane Gay is the author, most recently, of “Hunger” and a contributing opinion writer. Write to her at workfriend@nytimes.com.