Dear Abby >> We asked our 19-year-old college daughter, “Lulu,” to dog-sit and housesit sit several months ago. She knew our rule of no visitors allowed in our home while we were out of town. Because of this, we didn’t feel we needed to prepare the house by filing mail and documents away prior to our short trip.

Lulu had her new boyfriend of a few weeks stay over for the weekend. She not only allowed this stranger into our home but also deceived us for months. It’s difficult to let go of our disappointment in her poor judgment by allowing a stranger into our home with unsecured documents out in the open.

Her sexual activities and consequences are her “adult” choices, but I’m not sure when I’ll be able to trust our daughter again. She had an opportunity to start building our trust shortly after we found out about “the weekend,” but didn’t take our consequences and rules seriously enough during her school break and lost access to some privileges. Yes, she did start counseling sessions this past semester. Where do we go from here?

— No Trust in New Mexico

Dear No trust >> Since we now know Lulu has poor judgment and lacks respect for your rules, take away your house key (if you haven’t already), practice keeping your financial documents under lock and key when you’re not in the house and hire a dog sitter. Then, cross your fingers and hope the counseling your daughter is receiving helps her become more mature and make better choices.

Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.