20. (tie) Travis Kelce

Manages a few receptions during garbage time. Then again, the Chiefs’ entire game was garbage time.

20. (tie) Nick Sirianni

Eagles made sure they built up a big enough lead that even their coach couldn’t blow it.

20. (tie) Luka Doncic

Almost as surprised by the blowout of the Chiefs as he was by his trade to the Lakers.

19. Fox NFL Sunday

Its 5½ hour pregame show felt about five hours too long.

18. Bill Belichick

Regales his girlfriend with stories about the Superdome Super Bowl he won while she was en utero.

17. Cooper DeJean

Patrick Mahomes was kind enough to give him a pick six for his birthday.

16. Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal

Not aging quite as gracefully as, say, Tom Brady.

15. Tom Brady

Still should have stuck to quarterbacking.

14. Roger Goodell

Taylor Swift breaks his record for loudest boos received at a Super Bowl.

13. Matthew McConaughey

Maybe just maybe, football is an Uber Eats conspiracy to keep this dude gainfully employed?

12. Andy Reid

Three-peat? His Chiefs had hard enough time getting three points.

11. Elon Musk

Quits watching at halftime, then gets back to work running the country.

10. Aaron Rodgers

Tunes in to game he’ll never play in again after spending the day updating resume on LinkedIn.

9. Saquon Barkley

Star running back proved to be the only Eagle that K.C. was able to effectively tackle.

8. The Mannings

Speaking of “Idiot Kickers” …

7. Officials

Not even they could save the Chiefs this Sunday.6. Kendrick Lamar

What? No duet with Drake?

5. Donald Trump

Counting down days to Super Bowl LXV at Trump Dome in Mar-a-Gaza.

4. Jalen Hurts

Most Valuable Tush needed only one good push.

3. Taylor Swift

World’s most famous woman winds up with less Super Bowl screen time than Eugene Levy’s eyebrows.

2. Patrick Mahomes

Future hall of famer never showed any quit. His Chiefs teammates? Not so much … .

1. Eagles front four

Turns out Chiefs’ offensive line had more holes than the plot of a typical Marvel movie.

Others receiving votes

Jon Batiste, A.J. Brown, Bradley Cooper and Jon Hamm, Philadelphia fans, Jake Elliott, Pat McAfee, Jimmy Johnson, Terry Bradshaw, Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, Rob Gronkowski, Chris Jones, Bourbon Street, Randy Moss, Kevin Burkhart, Kellen Moore, Harrison Butker.

You can hear Kevin Cusick on Wednesdays on Bob Sansevere’s “BS Show” podcast on iTunes. You can follow Kevin on X — @theloopnow. He can be reached at kcusick@pioneerpress.com.