Q I work in a small, close-knit, diverse team in a large health care organization. We have worked well together for years and have occasionally, and happily, socialized together outside of work. Recently there has been a marked cooling between two of my colleagues. They had a scuffle over an office-related issue (parking), which probably would not have been a big deal, but then one of them (P) trash-talked the other (Q) in Spanish to another Spanish-speaking colleague. The issue is that this happened right in front of Q, who understands Spanish, which was not known by P. I want to tell P that Q understands Spanish. I worry more will be said in this way, leading to more hard feelings. Is it OK to lean in like this?

— Anonymous

A This feels a little like an “A-story” in an NBC sitcom. (I’d call the episode “Mind Your P’s and Q’s.”) But I will dispense with the amusement because the reality is this isn’t a situation comedy but a situation — awkward! — and one I’m interested in tackling.

First things first: parking. You may think it’s not a big deal, but it’s an issue for a fair number of us. (I live in Los Angeles.) Of course, it’s possible, even likely, that the bad vibes that resulted from the parking fracas are evidence of a deeper conflict between your two colleagues. But sometimes a parking space is just a parking space.

A few observations and opinions.

No. 1: That Q understands Spanish heightens the stakes in this scenario, but it’s also secondary. The bigger issue is that P decided it was OK to trash-talk a colleague in front of that colleague.

No. 2: See above. (I can’t stress enough how inappropriate this was.)

You’re wondering whether you should tell P that Q understood what P had to say. Do you worry that more tension will arise if you do tell? Or do you worry that P will continue to trash-talk Q because P is unaware that Q understands Spanish? Or is it a little of both? In a perfect world, P would be horrified and embarrassed to know that Q understood everything. Then again, P felt comfortable enough to trash-talk Q in front of Q. So maybe all bets are off.

How close are you to these two? It sounds as if you’re at a bit of a remove because you describe your socialization with P outside of work as being “occasional.” This complicates things, because it may appear (to P) that you’re picking sides in a matter that is outside your scope. That said, it couldn’t hurt to give P a quiet heads-up about Q’s literacy in Spanish. You could say something like: “I just wanted you to know that I think Q’s feelings were hurt the other day when you complained about the parking situation. Q understands Spanish, you know.”

P can take it from there and decide whether to offer Q an apology or keep any complaints private, no matter the lingua franca. As for Q, I don’t think there’s anything you can, or need, to do or say. (In the sitcom version, the stakes are heightened after Q leaves a note that says “Hablo Español” on the windshield of P’s car. Unsigned.)

Anna Holmes is an award-winning writer, editor and creative exec whose work has appeared in numerous publications, including the New York Times, Washington Post, and The New Yorker.