Dear Eric >> I am two months pregnant, or so I thought. Three months ago, I met Steve at a concert. Our relationship developed quickly, and we became intimate after only a few weeks.

Steve is so excited about the baby. It would be his first. He has even offered to marry me as soon as possible.

When I went for a checkup the other day, the doctor told me the baby is four months old, not two months. There is no mistake about it.

Several weeks before meeting Steve, I had a brief encounter with another man. It ended badly (he cheated on me). I honestly had no idea I was already pregnant when I met Steve.

How do I tell Steve the truth? He might dump me and then I would be all alone.

— At a Crossroads

Dear Crossroads >> Though the conversations you and Steve need to have may be tough, they’d be necessary for the long-term health of your relationship, whether the baby was his or not. It’s possible to fall head-over-heels in love in three months, and there are surely couples who have built happy marriages on that initial spark, but I worry that the flurry of excitement you’ve both been feeling may have obscured some of the foundational work that you need to do. Some of that work involves figuring out where your values align and where they diverge. You’ll also want to contact the father of the child to keep him abreast of your plans and allow him the chance to have a relationship with the child. Being able to talk to Steve about how that relationship will affect your relationship, if at all, may help.

Tell Steve the full truth. It’s quite possible he will be equally excited about co-parenting with you regardless of genetics.

Dear Eric >> I play in a community orchestra and sit next to a woman who sometimes comes to rehearsal smelling strongly of alcohol. She has told me that she has been arrested for DUI.

In the past, I have offered to give her a ride home and she said, “I’m just tired.” I told her that she smelled strongly of alcohol, and she said, “I’ll be fine.” Last night, she again came to rehearsal smelling of alcohol. She was very confused and often did not know where we were in the music. This is unusual for her. What is my responsibility here? I cannot force her to accept a ride, but I would feel terrible if she hurt someone or was hurt herself. What should I do?

— Concerned Acquaintance

Dear Acquaintance >> If she is driving to and from rehearsal after drinking, as her behavior suggests, she poses a huge danger to herself and others. You can be direct with her if it ever happens again, which I hope it doesn’t. “Your behavior is unusual, and I’m concerned. I don’t feel comfortable with you on the road in this state. I can give you a ride or I can call someone to help you. But if you choose to leave on your own, I’ll feel a responsibility to have law enforcement check on you.”

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com.