Dear Eric >> My husband doesn’t live in the country in which he was born. Because of that, I’ve tried to connect with his family. We visited his family over the years and vice versa. He has a cousin who asked if we could stay in touch through the messaging app WhatsApp and her husband also requested to be included. Great!

Unfortunately, his wife uses the app to send every TikTok video she finds interesting, and every prayer printed on her links. I’m a Christian and love the Lord, but I don’t need 12 messages a day about anything from anyone.

— WhatsApprehension

Dear WhatsApprehension >> We need a global conference on chat etiquette. The memes are out of control.

You have a few options here. If she’s sending the memes and videos directly, you can ask her to take you out of the rotation for the sake of your data, your notifications, or to keep you from distraction. It’s hard to take offense when someone says they simply don’t have the bandwidth (mental or technological) for every online find.

You can also mute her for a time, checking in when you need to chat or if you have a sudden appetite for viewing five hours of TikToks in a row. This option has its pitfalls, of course — what if she sends an important message amidst the barrage? Dear Eric >> My 35-year-old brother “Jeff” lives in another state and has been dating and living with his 25-year-old girlfriend for five years. He has flown home to visit us several times over the years but has never brought her with him to meet us.

At the beginning of the relationship, she was very abusive toward him. He had her arrested and thrown in jail once.

He has admitted not loving her and not being attracted to her anymore but has continued his relationship with her. He obviously does not give us any reason to support his relationship.

Our mother paid for an all-inclusive family trip for him, our (single) brother, my husband and myself. She did not invite his girlfriend because she has never met any of us. “Jeff” was offended by this, so decided he wasn’t going on the vacation.

So, now our biggest fears have come true. He doesn’t speak to any of us. He has completely isolated himself with the girlfriend thousands of miles away. I miss him, and I worry so much about his well-being. I know he won’t welcome me with open arms because I do not support his relationship, but how do I approach him to try to reconcile?

— Worried About Baby Bro

Dear Worried >> The easiest path may not be the best path here. It seems likely that if you concede to his reality — his girlfriend is a “part of the family”; the problems of the past don’t exist — he’ll reconcile. But that doesn’t help anyone.

Jeff has been very clear about the issues he has with his relationship (some of which are of his own creation), and he hasn’t made any efforts to join the two houses.