Spring is often equated with the flowering of new possibilities. And as I turn 68, I am learning one of the most important aspects of growth and change is the inherent risk in learning something new and being a beginner. It is common knowledge that new activities enhance neuroplasticity, which refers to the rewiring of the brain to strengthen cognitive abilities and boost brain fitness. But our ability for emotional plasticity, which is our ability to rewire our emotional responses, remains key to our mental health and happiness. We often are accustomed to a certain level of success in our professional and personal endeavors. Whether in the form of work accomplishments, degrees we have earned, athletic prowess or creative expression, we’ve been “around the block.” Yet although there may be a sense of security and confidence, there is the potential for an incarceration of sorts, inhibiting our freedom to change. We can be shackled by our expertise. “Shoshin,” or “beginners mind,” is a concept from Zen Buddhism highlighting the power of openness, curiosity and wonder.

Citing Eleanor Roosevelt, “Do one thing every day that scares you,” encouraged me to journey into the world of improvisation and stand-up comedy. And as a therapist who has sat in the seat of both therapist and client, stand up, like more traditional therapy, has brought my vulnerabilities and challenges center stage, with lights up! At first, due to being older, the biggest challenge was being out past 7 p.m. But over the past year, that became the least of it.

There’s a universality to many of our insecurities including our fears about being not good enough, criticized, rejected, unlovable to name a few. Unfortunately, the list is long when we face the lies we tell ourselves. I have always said, my clients stop seeing me when they have learned to like and accept themselves enough. Trying something new inevitably triggers one’s fear about acceptance and being good enough. We confront our tendency to judge ourselves and decide our self-worth according to how others respond to us. That complete reliance on the external, the audience in our lives, inevitably will lead to lights out and a darkness within.

One’s dependency on another’s perception of us, and the over-reliance on the audience in our everyday lives, inhibits the seeds of creativity. Our creativity evolves from deep waters within, not from our reliance on the external.

But change and self-growth certainly are not dependent on taking the stage but just risking something new, being a beginner and being open to learning. One has to remember that critique is not criticism, but instead descriptive, encouraging and supportive. But unless we separate out who we truly are from our achievements and success, we can feel criticized versus taught, rejected versus allowing an attentive embrace. Being a beginner is an emotional burlesque show where we are stripped of our coverings and left with ourselves. The healing comes with increased acceptance. From that place of alignment, we have the strength to change and grow. I’ve heard it said, “You have to show up to suck to show up to shine.” It is in the breaking through of our self-inflicted barriers that we change the hue of our forever-shifting landscape.

Often trying something new demands we join a class or workshop fostering the benefits of community. And within this microcosm, we learn how not to be the critical audience toward one another, but instead share the stage in our humanity. There is a kind connection with others when our cloaks are removed. A value this world seems to have forgotten.

My granddaughter continues to teach me the beauty of “beginners mind.” She changes and grows each day with a wide-eyed wonder. But it isn’t only that she embraces the magic of learning and curiosity. She does it with such delight and celebration of herself. As I watched her two-year-old’s rendition of “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star,” the sparkle was her gleefully clapping at her performance over and over. It is learning to applaud ourselves and become our own embracing audience that ensures the show will go on with lights up.

Priscilla Dann-Courtney may be reached at: priscillacourtney3@gmail.com.