Dear Amy >> Do people report to you that the Covid pandemic changed them?
It changed me.
I thought the isolation wouldn’t bother me because I am an introverted woman. I treasure my solitude.
There were times when I didn’t see another human being for a week or 10 days.
I went only to the store and the library just to see another human being and chat for a minute or two. That seemed to suffice — after all, for two years that person walking toward me might be carrying a disease that could kill me.
I remember thinking it’s as though I am in a spaceship that keeps circling the Earth, and I can’t land.
Well, now I have landed, and I find that I am less tolerant than I used to be, and a lot more cynical.
My compassion for others has descended to a new low.
I have dropped a couple of long-term friendships because I couldn’t bear the other person’s neediness. It was as if I was for years wearing rose-colored glasses, but they fell off and now I see the world differently.
I am active again in an art group I’ve been a member of for 17 years and I attend a music circle where we make music for each other, so it’s not that I have become totally anti-social.
What’s your take?
— E. D.
Dear E.D. >> Yes, people do report that the pandemic has changed them. In fact, I can hardly imagine passing through these recent years without being changed.
Your description of feeling as if you were aboard a spaceship is memorably vivid.
During the years of the pandemic, your ever-present anxiety had an effect on your body’s chemistry. Stress hormones flooding your body, without relief, can have a profound effect on your physical and mental health.
Some of the reactions and feelings you report having now would otherwise be seen as familiar signs of depression — or at least passing through a depressive phase.
I suggest that you do some research on the long-term effect of stress, and make sure you see your GP for a thorough checkup. Describe your current mental posture. Seeing a therapist could help.
My own prescription for you would be to spend as much time as possible outdoors, and to double up on your art and music — both of which are extremely healing for your soul and exceptionally good for your cognitive and mental health.
Contact Amy Dickinson via email, askamy@amydickinson.com.