During my college years (with a husband and 5 year old daughter), my aunt told me, “Lucy, most people are circles or squares, and you, my dear, are a triangle. I took that as a compliment. I didn’t want to be like everyone else. Ever.

In high school, I got along with everyone. Even the teachers. I think I was kind of a goofy girl (in my mind anyway). I mostly just wanted to have fun.

For our class graduation party, I wore a cool capris outfit, matching top and bottom, when the strict dress code for the girls was dresses. Fortunately, I knew the chaperones (best friends of my parents) who let me into the dance with just a friendly greeting, and a wink of an eye.

When in college, I volunteered (while taking a full course load, raising my daughter and caring for my husband) at the university greenhouse, and the greenhouse keeper gave me plants and cuttings that I made into big plants. He was grateful for the help and I loved the greenhouse environment.

My dear friend in married housing at the university was Rosa, from Peru. We played racket ball daily. I never won even one game but the games themselves were so fun and so challenging. When I moved away from Rosa to California, I played a man who I beat, hands down. First time I won!

There was only one job that I held that would fit into a square box; doing some kind a menial job in a large insurance business, while I was pregnant. I didn’t last long. It was as hard to play by corporate rules as it was to color in the lines.

Eventually I worked freelance. For ever more.

Research says that a Triangle is described as driven, ambitious and goal oriented. (True for me.) They are typically assertive, competitive and enjoy leading. (Mostly true for me.) They prioritize achieving success and may be less concerned with emotional connections or details. (Definitely not me.)

So a bit right triangle. A bit wrong triangle.

I’ve asked some of my friends to identify themselves as a circle, square or triangle but I pretty much know which they are and it’s not an easy question to answer so I don’t really expect them to answer.

Research said that Squares are known for their logical, detail-oriented, and structured approach. They value order, stability, and adherence to rules and schedules. They are dependable, responsible and appreciate structure.

Circles are characterized by their social, empathetic, and nurturing nature. They prioritize relationships, harmony, and collaboration. They are generally accommodating, supportive, and may seek to avoid conflict. (Hello Mabel!)

When I had bronchitis one time, my friend Mabel spent so much time taking care of me that I suggested that she sign up with IHSS (In Home Supportive Services) so she’d get paid for all the time she spent helping me. Which she did. Now that she’s moved to Mendocino County, she’s signed up to help someone there. A true Circle, with some Square thrown in.

My BFF, who lives most of the year in Mexico, is definitely a Triangle. She owned a whole block of buildings in a major city, which she turned into successful resale shops. After many years she retired, sold them all and now spends time making art on an island beach-side in Mexico out of natural materials and what she calls “doodling” with colored pens. That was long after she spent 5 years sailing from San Francisco to the Panama Canal. Triangle for sure.

What’s a girl to do?…realize that when my aunt said I was a Triangle, that it gave me the confidence to be who I was, who I am now.

Lucy Llewellyn Byard welcomes comments and shares. To contact her, email lucywgtd@gmail.com