Melissa Melvin-Rodriguez mrodriguez@charlotteobserver.com
When Debbie Arias walked out of Lake Forest Church’s The Learning Tree in Huntersville on Friday, her eyes were blinded — for just a second — by the bright, warm, noonday sun.
A couple of seconds later, the 62-year-old preschool teacher’s eyes were filled with tears.
“MERRY CHRISTMAS!!” shouted a group of about 30 smiling friends, family members, co-workers, parents of kids she works with, and other supporters huddled around a red Toyota Prius. A giant white bow graced the roof and an equally large gift basket sat on the front passenger seat.
“Are you gonna fall over?” someone asked her.
For a moment, it appeared as though Debbie just might. But after collecting hugs from her three grandchildren and one from her daughter, she looked steady on her feet, even if her voice wouldn’t stop shaking.
“I didn’t need a new car!” Debbie insisted, laughing as she continued to cry, dabbing at her wet cheeks.
“Yes you did!” a woman in the crowd quickly countered.
Based on looking at the rickety vehicle Debbie had been driving for the past four years, it’d be hard to disagree with this woman.
And based on listening to the way those who know Miss Debbie gush about Miss Debbie, well, she didn’t just need one; she deserved one, too.
Struggling to make ends meet
As a young woman and mother, through the 1980s and into the ’90s, Debbie taught second grade at a Christian school in South Florida. Her daughter, Kellee, attended that school from first through eighth grade, and had her mom as her second grade teacher — which was not a point of embarrassment for Kellee, but of pride.
“I have distinct memories,” Kellee Olmsted said, “of the high schoolers fighting over getting to be the teacher helper in her room, and of being so proud to be her daughter because everybody loved her so much. I can remember people being like, ‘You’re so lucky that she’s your mom!’”
Kellee said her mother was named teacher of the year at the school several times.
But when Kellee was in eighth grade, Debbie went through a painful divorce, then spent a couple of years working two part-time jobs — one at a Christian preschool and a second at a retail job that offered night and weekend hours.
Then, when Kellee was 16, something unimaginably devastating happened: Her grandparents — Debbie’s mom and dad — both died on the same day.
Debbie’s father’s health had been in rapid decline due to Alzheimer’s, and the whole family had gathered to be with him in Ohio near the end; but, just hours before he passed at home, Debbie’s mother died at the hospital after suffering a stroke in the kitchen.
By that point, Debbie had stopped working with kids entirely and had shifted to the retail job full-time. It wasn’t until just four years ago that she finally returned to teaching preschool children, when she moved to Charlotte from Florida to be close to her three grandchildren (Kellee’s kids) and wound up being one of the first hires at The Learning Tree, the preschool program at Lake Forest Church.
It turned out to be a great fit for everyone.
“You have people that you hire, and they’re good at what they do, but they’re also doing it for a paycheck,” said Mitch White, executive pastor of Lake Forest Church. “With Miss Debbie, it’s just in her blood. She was created to love on kids and to teach kids. She’s one of those folks that if she could figure out a way to not even get paid to be a teacher, then she’d do it. ”
Debbie was getting paid, of course, but as someone who had always worked teaching or retail jobs, she’d certainly never been flush with cash.
In fact, after she relocated to North Carolina, she moved in with Kellee, to make living on a preschool teacher’s wage more manageable. She also bought a vehicle on the cheap: a light-gold-colored 2006 Toyota Sienna minivan with 150,000 miles on it, from a friend of Kellee’s who let Debbie make payments toward the $3,000 cost over time.
The vehicle was far from glamorous. But Debbie didn’t mind. She’s never been materialistic. All she cared was whether it was reliable or not.
Problem is, this fall, it became clear that it was no longer reliable, and that a fair amount of money would be needed — a lot more than Debbie had in her bank account — to make it so again.
‘Don’t make me go
in Mimi’s van!’
There are some blunt ways to describe Debbie’s old minivan.
“It’s pretty dilapidated in my opinion,” said Whitnie Sharp, whose 4-year-old daughter Cora is in Miss Debbie’s class at The Learning Tree.
Said another Debbie — Debbie Shirkey, the director of the school: “It’s a wreck.”
“It makes a God-awful noise when you’re in it. Not always, but about 80% of the time,” added Kellee, who said the vehicle had damage from being sideswiped and rear-ended that was never repaired. “My 14-year-old is mortified to get in the van with her. She’s always like, ‘Don’t make me go in Mimi’s van!’”
They all couldn’t help but laugh a little, affectionately, while describing the vehicle. But it had developed some serious problems as it neared the 200,000-mile mark.
According to an evaluation that a mechanic did as a favor to Miss Debbie in the fall, the Sienna needed an estimated $1,600 in repairs to get it in the shape necessary to pass its next state inspection, which was due in March. But the mechanic also leveled with her, saying that, really, to make it reliable again, it needed at least $3,000 worth of work.
On the one hand, Kellee said, her mom’s van probably was not even worth $3,000. On the other, Miss Debbie didn’t want to take on a car payment.
So Miss Debbie decided she’d figure out how to come up with the money for the repairs after getting through Christmas.
It wasn’t long before Kellee’s 12-year-old son Kaden felt moved to do something to try to help.
“He was like, ‘We should make a video and talk all about how wonderful Mimi is and then show pictures of her van,’” Kellee recalled of her son’s idea to solicit donations on his grandmother’s behalf. “And I was like, ‘Yeeaahhhh, that’s a great idea, Kaden. That’s really sweet.’ But to me, it just didn’t feel like — as her daughter — I don’t know. It didn’t feel like something I should be doing.”
Turned out she didn’t have to.
A big idea gains momentum
As the room mom for her daughter Cora’s class, Whitnie Sharp sees more of Miss Debbie than the average parent. And she saw something recently that she thinks sums up Miss Debbie’s dedication perfectly.
At the beginning of December, Whitnie said, there was a week when Miss Debbie was officially on vacation, “but she still came into the school to help out with all of the kids to do their Christmas projects. The whole week!”
“And she spends every last dime that she has on her kids,” added Whitnie, herself a former third-grade teacher. “I’m not even being dramatic. Whether that be decorations for the classroom, toys, learning supplies, or prize-box stuff to motivate the kids, every last dime she has goes into her classroom. I mean, she’s amazing.”
With that being said, earlier this month, when it came time to figure out what the parents could pool contributions to buy Miss Debbie as a Christmas gift from the class, they struggled — because they knew if they got her a Visa gift card, or an Amazon gift card, she’d just use it to buy decorations, toys, supplies or prize-box stuff.
So Whitnie decided to get thoughts from Kellee, who works next-door to her mom, at the church, as Lake Forest’s children’s ministry coordinator.
Kellee half-jokingly suggested that the parents could just hand Miss Debbie a little bit of cash because her minivan was falling apart and she was saving up to fix it.
Whitnie took it seriously. But she didn’t think the class’s 20 families could drum up $1,600 alone, so she decided to start a GoFundMe fundraising campaign and see how far they could get with that.
They just needed to be super-secretive about it, if they were going to make it a surprise. That meant only clueing in people at the church and at the school who absolutely needed to know, it meant blocking Miss Debbie from seeing all related posts on social media, it meant parents not telling their loose-lipped 3- and 4-year-old children.
The GoFundMe was set up on Dec. 6. Donations started flowing in.
Not long after that, another parent — Amy Wheeler, whose 4-year-old son Andrew is in Miss Debbie’s class, and who also is a former schoolteacher — chimed in with a new suggestion.
“It’s somebody who does so much for the community,” Amy said. “There’s a lot of people that want things and ask for things. She’s never asked for anything. ... I was like, ‘The car, to fix it, is $1,600. We’ve raised $3,000. That’s even more than the van is worth. I don’t know if I’m channeling Oprah, or want to be Santa, but we need to do more. I think this lady deserves it.
“Let’s get her a new van.’”
The right place at the right time
At first, Amy, a former public relations specialist for a NASCAR team, suggested approaching car dealerships and presenting them with Miss Debbie’s story, and telling them they had been in touch with the media. The dealerships, she figured, would smell a good PR opportunity.
But that’s not how this all came to be. Here’s what unfolded, in short order, last week:
Whitnie shared the story with members of the private “Denver, NC Moms Group” on Facebook, mentioned they’d raised more than $3,500, and asked whether anyone had thoughts on how they might be able to score a new or used car at a deep discount.
Within what felt like just a matter of seconds, a Denver mom named Jennifer Guthrie saw the post.
“My mother-in-law’s a retired teacher,” Jennifer explained. “The comments in the GoFundMe touched me. I have a 5-year-old son, and it’s the teachers that leave lasting impressions and help mold our kids and our future. And it’s that time — a magical time of year — and we can help change somebody’s life. You don’t often get that opportunity.”
She quickly messaged Whitnie to say she worked for Toyota (Jennifer is an operations manager for Southeast Toyota Distributors) and that she could have one of her dealership contacts reach out to her.
Within a few more minutes, Whitnie was fielding a call from Jennifer’s dealership contact.
It was the easiest negotiation she’s ever had for a car purchase.
‘Out of the goodness of
his heart’
After reviewing everything, Andy Lawhon, general manager at Mike Johnson’s Hickory Toyota, told Whitnie that if they gave him the $3,700 and change from the GoFundMe, plus Miss Debbie’s minivan, he would put Miss Debbie in a vehicle he could approve as a donation: a red 2015 Toyota Prius.
The hybrid electric compact car had 110,000 miles on it and carried a sticker price of $15,500 plus taxes and fees. So, essentially, Andy’s dealership was writing off $10,000-$11,000. He included a year of free oil changes. Jennifer said she’d throw in $500 toward future service expenses.
“This is just a quiet, help-somebody-out-that-can’t-really-help-herself-right-now thing,” Andy said. After a pause, the father of four young sons added: “Personally, I don’t think these people are paid enough to raise our youth.”
There is no mistaking the fact that he seemed a little uncomfortable with getting any attention for his good deed.
Which made sense after hearing Whitnie say this:
“I didn’t hound him, I didn’t tell him, ‘Hey, guess what? The media’s gonna be there. Aren’t you excited for that?’ He had no idea. I didn’t even tell him that I’d contacted (a reporter) until after he had already told me about giving us the Prius. ...
“Out of the goodness of his heart, knowing that she’s a teacher, knowing that she has touched the lives of so many kids around her — that was enough of a reason for him to do whatever he could do to make sure that he helped us get her a car. It’s something that I don’t run into a lot anymore.”
Since then, it’s just been the waiting and the keeping it a secret that’s been the hard part.
Oh, and this burning question: How would Miss Debbie react?
‘It’s more about
the gesture’
Yes, a red car is a statement. Yes, a Prius makes a statement. Not everyone would like someone picking that particular car out for them without their stamp of approval.
But Kellee knew it wouldn’t matter to her mom. That her mom isn’t “everyone.”
“Again, she’s not materialistic at all. But she’s very sentimental,” Kellee said the week before Friday’s gift-giving ceremony. “I think it could have been any type of car. It’s more about the gesture, and that people love her and appreciate who she is than what kind of car it is. She’s just gonna cherish the car just because of what it represents.”
As it turned out, her mom loved both the sentiment and the specific car she received.
Asked what she thought of the red, Miss Debbie said: “I think —” She paused for a couple of seconds, then finished the thought: “I think I might get a ticket!” She laughed, and laughter erupted around her.
“It’s gorgeous. I love red cars,” she continued. “I don’t know if I’ll know how to drive it. It’s got, like, modern-day stuff on it. My van, I still unlock it with a key at the door!”
She laughed some more. But she also cried plenty.
“I’m so overwhelmed,” Miss Debbie said, as several people around her joined her in wiping away tears.
“What I do, I really do it ’cause I love the kids. But it still means so much to me that they — that my parents — that they know ... how much I really do care for the kids,” she said, her voice hitching.
“I love every minute I’m with them. I love every minute that I’m here.”
Théoden Janes: 704-358-5897, @theodenjanes