Sometimes I look at the titles of the many two-bit reality shows lurking in basic cable, and I feel envy.

I’d never want to work for a reality show in any capacity, not as a character and not as a producer who steers the story lines. But oh how I would love to have the opportunity to name a few of them.

Bad puns, twisted song titles, and kooky alliterations — it just doesn’t get much better. Naming reality shows would be as much fun as naming pet stores and getting to substitute “paws’’ for “pause’’ and “ruff’’ for “rough.’’ Or naming paint colors and getting to come up with the likes of Whispering Peach and Dinner Mint.

FYI’s “Bride & Prejudice’’? Love it. And so, I’m assuming, would Jane Austen.

Esquire’s “Friday Night Tykes’’? Lifetime’s “The Fairy Jobmother’’? Love them even more.

Kudos, too, to wordplay titles that rely on name recognition, such as Pivot’s “Raising McCain,’’ Lifetime’s “Bristol Palin: Life’s a Tripp,’’ and Lifetime’s “Roseanne’s Nuts’’ (I see what they did there).

“Breaking Amish’’? All bow. And bow again.

Some people underestimate the amount of creativity it takes to come up with History’s “Pawn Stars,’’ the truTV version, “Hardcore Pawn,’’ and the TLC version, “Pawn Queens.’’

And they may not understand that, every now and then, the namer of reality shows must also employ artistic restraint as much as imagination. For example, VH1 chose not to give its singles series a sly title, so as not to obscure its appeal: “Dating Naked.’’ Likewise Discovery, with “Naked & Afraid.’’ Sometime, direct is the way to go.

Hey, let’s start a reality show about titling reality shows. “The Name Game’’? “The Dub Club’’? “Destination Designation’’? “Designation Nation’’? OK, I’ll stop now.

Matthew Gilbert can be reached at matthew.gilbert@globe.com.