Q. During a recent visit with my father (age 75) and my stepmother (age 64), my father informed me that I would be the executor of his will.

His will states that in the event of his death, everything would go to his wife (who is not my mother) and, subsequently, upon her death, anything remaining would go to me.

Being that I am his only child/daughter (they never had children) and we have a good relationship, I cannot help but feel hurt and angry.

My children (his only grandchildren, whom he professes to love so much), are not mentioned in his will, either.

Being that he is his wife’s sole provider and that she is 11 years his junior, I understand the practical side of this decision. However, emotionally, I can’t get over the fact that I will receive nothing from my father after his death.

Although I am to get “everything’’ remaining upon her death, the reality is that I will get nothing because when he dies, she will move back to Europe to live out the rest of her days, possibly even remarry, and anything left will just get absorbed into her new life.

Although I am married and financially stable, I am having a very hard time processing this news. I know it’s his money so he can do with it what he chooses, but being his only daughter, I can’t help but feel left out and hurt.

How do I get past this?

Left Out

A. You seem to be viewing this from the perspective that your father could die soon, leaving his current assets behind. But depending on your father’s health and how he ages, his wife could end up caring for him for 20 years. This is the challenging underside of being the younger spouse.

You seem to equate your father’s financial assets with how much he loves you and your children, but his assets are there to pay for his life until his death, and his wife’s life afterward.

Consider yourself lucky that he has planned and done well enough not to be a financial burden to you, his only child.

It would be great if he would leave something specific (aside from money) to your children.

Ask him if he would be willing to pick out something for them to receive as a remembrance.

Amy Dickinson can be reached at askamy@tribpub.com.