‘I don’t like the fact that when you get married as a woman you just kind of give up your last name. It’s nice to take your husband’s name, but then you’re like, “Oh, this thing I’ve had my whole life that’s my whole identity, that my great-grandparents came through Ellis Island with? I’ll just throw it in the trash. This guy seems cool. Bye.’’ What? Your name is nothing after you get married. All it is, is your [expletive] son’s bank account security question answer. That’s all your name is.’

— Nikki Glaser, host of Comedy Central’s “Not Safe with Nikki Glaser,’’ who plays Laugh Boston Friday and Saturday

NICK A. ZAINO III

Nick A. Zaino III can be reached at nick@nickzaino.com.