Q. My boyfriend and I are in a very complicated relationship — a long-distance one. He’s in America and I’m in Australia. However, that isn’t my problem. My boyfriend is 17 and I just turned 18. When I met him, he seemed really mature to me, and at times he still does. However, I see he has a lot of growing up to do, and I mean a lot. We often disagree about gender equality, racism, and political issues. I don’t like his stance on prominent issues around the world.

Will my boyfriend mature? Will he be able to see things for the way they are and not speak like a brainwashed teenager? I mean, I keep telling myself he’ll change, he’ll grow older, and with age comes intelligence, but I don’t know. What if I keep waiting and end up wasting my time?

Waiting for him to grow up

A. You must evaluate partners as they are now, even at 18. It’s not about what they might be later — in many, many, many years. That’s just relationship fanfiction.

At the moment, your guy lives on the other side of the world. His beliefs make you angry, and you want him to be someone else. If you don’t want to waste your time, you must leave him behind.

Also know that if your boyfriend lived in Australia, I’d still be telling you to break up with him. Maturity doesn’t always bring a shift in beliefs. He could become a super grown-up and oppose everything you stand for. Don’t expect age and intelligence to turn him into someone who thinks like you.

Meredith

READERS RESPOND:

LW — never ever go forward with any romantic relationship thinking that the other person should or will change. This is a mistake that many people (mainly women it seems) make all the time. MYANSWER

You are 18, and I’m not even sure you like your boyfriend. That’s normal at 18. Go find another one, one who lives near you. Or be single. That’s better than not even liking the person you are in a relationship with.

JACKIEFORREAL

There is nothing in this letter about why he should be your boyfriend. M has it right, break it off. Live a little, learn a lot.

CONNORMACLEOD

Is anyone else amazed that Meredith reaches an international audience?

MRCHARLIE462

He’ll grow up, his world views will likely change, but none of this will necessarily mean he is more mature. I guess the point is you both are young and both of you will change a lot over the course of your lives. You can only evaluate how things are in the present as you are changing and make decisions on how things are in these present moments.

SUNALSORISES

You’re a teenager. Worse, you’re a Millennial Teenager. Worse still, your boyfriend is a teenager. Ever worse still, he’s a younger Millennial Teenager. And you’re dating long distance. How many more warning flags need to fly before you realize you’re not going to win? Let your boyfriend go. It’s clear your values don’t match his.

HARRISBLACKWOODSTONE

Sweetie, nothing is that complicated at your age so just relax a little. You have a lot to figure out and plenty of time to do it. My wife of many years now insists that she really didn’t know who she was until she was in her mid-20s. And, having known her since her late teens, your age actually, I have to agree with her. She didn’t, for years, until she did.

HARRYRPITTS

Throw him away and boomerang into a new relationship with someone local.

BLISTERED-TOE

Oh boy. Letter Writer, at such a long distance all you can really do is talk to each other anyway, so if you’re getting to the point where you’re not even enjoying that, what is the point? (Australia is really fun, though, I will say that.) ELLLEEM

I would love to go but man 24 hours in a plane? I don’t know if I can deal with that.

MYANSWER

I spent about a month there just after graduating college in a “what-am-I-doing-with-my-life’’ moment. It’s extremely expensive there, but it’s so gorgeous. ELLEEM

Column and comments are edited and reprinted from boston.com/loveletters. Send letters to meredith.goldstein@globe.com.